Desperate for Time

Lately I have felt that I am fresh out of time for anything. I want so desperately to be able to do it all because I love to do everything. I love to be part of the farm and take care of all the animals and build the pens and weed the garden. I love to go to all the fun church family events and watch the kids bond over hotdogs and pools. I love to go the sports and watch the teams congratulate each other even in a loss. I love it all, but I don’t have the time for it all.

I feel so desperate for more time. I also feel desperate for more of my Jesus because in all this loss of time I have lost the time that I would spend in His presence reading and studying the Word, praying, and having those important conversations.

I used to have an allotted time each day that I would have quiet, uninterrupted time being able to study and pray, read and write. Now I have no time. I get up at 5 in the morning to get ready for work and head out thirty minutes later. I work all day and sometimes more than I am supposed to. Then I come home and I am tired, really tired, but I then do what chores need to be done at home with my family until it’s time to make and eat dinner. I am stretched just keeping up with that, but I try to still find time to write, edit, and publish for Titus II Woman and also be active in our home church.

I don’t tell you all this as a pity party. I feel so blessed to be able to provide for my family and have the opportunity to help with the quality of life for the people I work with and for. God has shown me kindness in this transition of life, but I still want Him more than all this and I often feel empty, weak, and lonely.

Here is what I learned, as I just took some time for me today, from Psalm 91 (I encourage you to read the whole chapter):pslm 91

  • I am not empty, because God is my drink that I can fill myself with every day.

I am not weak, because God is my strength and lives within me.

  1. I am not alone, because God is always with me.
  2. God is my dwelling place.

God is always there for me when I choose to draw close to him. I have security in Him. His is my dwelling place and there I have no worries.

Can I encourage you today to make Him your dwelling place? Spend those few moments you do have in His presence because even if it’s just one or two minutes He can fill you to a place of fullness that you never thought you would have again. My heart is full of His goodness and grace.

Lord, draw me close to you. I pray that I won’t feelings of emptiness, weakness, or loneliness drag me down into the pit of insecurity. Let those feelings trigger me to bring them to you and trade them for assurance. I want my drawing close to you to be a permanent dwelling place where I know I can be filled with strength, grace, and security. I want your love to shine through me. And I want your peace to be the path I walk. Your truth to be  my wisdom when I talk. Amen.

Tara DeMaris

Tara is the founder and president of Titus II Woman Ministries as well as the wife to David and the mother to their four children. Together, they make their home in Southeast Idaho. She is a graduate of Crown College and most passionate about reaching the hearts of women of all ages and customs. She loves to write and teach God's Word. Favorite Quote - "Make history with God and He will make history through you."
Tara is the founder and president of Titus II Woman Ministries as well as the wife to David and the mother to their four children. Together, they make their home in Southeast Idaho. She is a graduate of Crown College and most passionate about reaching the hearts of women of all ages and customs. She loves to write and teach God’s Word. Favorite Quote – “Make history with God and He will make history through you.”

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