“What is wrong with me?” “Why don’t they like me?” “Did I do something wrong?” These are just a few things that were running through my head as I drove home alone in my Durango.
Ladies, I am thirty-five years old and I still struggle with the desire of wanting people to like me; wanting to be around me and be “friends”. I know that my worth is not determined by those who “like” me, but there are times that I feel worthless if someone doesn’t want to like me. I immediately go into a place of questioning myself.
I have always had a hard time dealing with rejection. This rejection would sometimes come from others, but mostly it would be from myself making something out of nothing. My brain often says one thing when it was not that way at all. Has this happened to you? I know I am not alone in this.
Here is the simple truth: I am worth more than silver and gold. In the eyes of Christ, I am worth more than diamonds. I am being continually refined. So are you.
There will always be moments where you don’t feel like you measure up to the status quo of those around you; like you don’t fit in. You may not fit in, but that is how God made you to be. You are made to be a different kind of woman. A woman who lives in truth and speaks that truth with how she lives her life. We are no more perfect than any other woman, but we know the truth of living a life in service to God in EVERYTHING we do and say. Titus 2:7 and 8 says this: “In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.”
What I am getting at is this: If I am having feelings of rejection and worthlessness, what good can I be to the woman next to me who doesn’t know that truth of her worth? How can I encourage her and tell her that she is worth more than gold when I struggle to see that truth in myself?
I don’t have to be liked by everyone and, let’s face it, that will just never ever happen. I will disappoint. I will say the wrong thing. I will not act as everyone thinks I should. I will not be the best friend to all. I don’t have to be the best at everything to please all people. I was not designed for this. I was designed to be a vulnerable woman who speaks life and truth and love to those around her in the only way that God has shown me how. I live life loved and I try to love those around me. Yes, even those deemed unlovable. Because those are the ones who need the most love.
They won’t always show up. You will have feeling of rejection. You will not always be liked by everyone. That is okay! You be the one who shows up. You be the encouragement to the rejected and you work toward liking the unlikable; OR at least pray for them. This isn’t an easy calling, but it’s worth every effort.
Lord, my heart isn’t always a happy love story of friendships and encouragement. Often, I feel left out and unlikeable, but that rejection does not define who I am in you. I ask that every woman who is feeling rejected, broke down, and unwanted see the truth of their worth in you and a path is brought to light for them to walk as a woman who lives a life of love for others. Bless lives as they walk past the unlikeable and open eyes and hearts to you because of their words and actions. Amen.